We had spent years just trying to get a proper diagnosis for our youngest son. We had finally reached the point where we were going to get a definitive answer. What answer was that? Does he or does he not have an Autism Spectrum Disorder? We had already ruled out that he had not met the criteria for Giftedness. All that was left was this.
We decided to take him to KU Medical Center in our metropolitan area. We were so used to being put on the waiting list at Children’s Mercy Hospital that we just assumed that we would be put on a waiting list at KU as well. But, to our pleasant surprise, once we contacted them and filled out the necessary paperwork, we were told that he would be scheduled for an evaluation within 4-6 weeks.
Leading up to the day of his appointment, I made sure to gather all previous evaluation and diagnosis reports, emails from school, report cards, and any notes and information I had printed from my own research. I wanted to make sure they had everything at their disposal to make the most informed decision based on the information that they were provided. I also prayed before we went. I prayed that the doctors would be able to see whatever it was that they needed to see in the observation of our son, that God would give them the knowledge that they need, and that they would reach a conclusion of the correct diagnosis.
The day of his appointment we arrived early and waited to be called back. Our son was excited as ever. When we were finally called back he seemed somewhat aloof and shy as the doctor began speaking to him. He eventually warmed up and was very cooperative with the doctor as expected. As the doctor was evaluating our son, he gave me a behavior assessment form to fill out. Once he was done observing and evaluating our son, he gathered the paperwork he had given me and all of the previous evaluation/diagnosis reports I had brought. He asked us to wait while he went to his office and observed all previous reports.
He came back in about thirty minutes and said that he was finished. He stated, “Your son does have an Autism Spectrum Disorder that would have been identified as Asperger’s Syndrome previously, and he has a coexisting condition of ADHD.” I was so relieved to hear those words come out of someone else’s mouth other than my own. The Godly wisdom that God had given me to know that it was Autism had been confirmed.
The next statement he said took me by surprise. He said, “As I read the previous reports, everyone was saying the same thing but somehow missed it.” As I sat there listening to him speak this, the thought that was running through my mind was, “God, why did we have to go through all of this if it has been evident all along?” He finished up by giving us a final report of his diagnosis, full of recommendations and resources.
I felt that a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders! No longer would we not have an explanation for his behaviors at school. Now we could ask for him to be provided with services that could help him improve and stop the things that were impeding his learning at school.
By the time we received an accurate diagnosis for our youngest son, he was 9 years old. It took years of frustration, heartache, worry, and deep trust in God for us to arrive at this point, 9 years later.
I again began to question, why did we have to go through all of that and two scriptures came to mind. Romans 8:28, ” And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose.” And Roman 5:3-5, ” And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; and patience, experience; and experience, hope: and hope maketh not ashamed: because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”
I realized that, God was working something in me that would be used for my good, and our son’s good. He allowed me to go through it to give me patience and experience that I would later use to advocate for our son and others. It also allowed me to hope in Him. And it become hope that was not misplaced by any means. It was hope that was not ashamed.
We may not always see what God is doing as He takes us through the process, but knowing that the process serves a purpose makes it easier to be thankful for in the end. Has God allowed you to go through something that when you look back on it, you realized though it wasn’t pleasant at the time it helped you grow into who you are today? If you haven’t experience that yet, keep living. God always gets the glory out of our situations.
Be encouraged in knowing, that sometimes God allows us to go through the fire sometimes so that we may come out as pure gold.
Nikki